Friday, March 18, 2011

A (Different) Love Story

Well I had no intentions of waiting this long to blog again and here it is Thursday!? How did it get to be Thursday March 17th?
Anyway, I read and reread Mama Kat's writing prompts over and over again and none struck me as a "must write"- until today.
So this is going to be my unconventional Love Story (at least as far as most interpretations of the prompt) because it's about my Mom.
My Mom is someone I have admired for most of my life, although most of my adolescent years I would never have admitted it to anyone! FOR. ANY. REASON! I mean parents aren't cool, right! I never had a "BFF" relationship with my Mom either; looking back, I'm great with that.  Now that I'm a Mom I realize, God didn't give them to me to friend, He gave them to me to parent!
But back to my point about admiring my Mom...she has always been a hard worker, a perfectionist, the one going the extra mile to get it right.  She married young, never planning to attend college, but then put herself through undergrad and a Masters degree.  By the time she graduated undergrad, there were three of us and she was about 30.
But Mom didn't stop there, she kept going for the higher degrees- for the credentials that would help her do what she loved. Often working a part-time job in addition to taking care of us and taking classes. She got her Master's in English and used that to teach both high school and college, but she really wanted her Master's in Spanish.
Mom is a fluent Spanish speaker.  Might not seem like a big deal until you see her/ us.  We are as white as white can be, from a very small town in NC (my hubby calls us hicks).  Mom didn't take much, if any, foreign language in high school, but most of it in college.  AFTER SHE WAS A MOM. After she was older than all the other students in her classes. When it was probably much harder to learn because we all know, the older you get, the more challenging some things are.
But again, Mom didn't stop there; she is primarily responsible for an entire Hispanic ministry at our small hometown church.  Before there were any Spanish speaking Pastors (or staff) she was the Hispanic Sunday School teacher and pastor.  She even translated sermons into headphones the Hispanic congregation could wear during worship.  Of the cuff, most of the time; on the spot translating! If it came out of the preacher's mouth, she was spitting it out of hers a few nano-seconds later, only in Spanish.

Mom really did show me that you are never too old to chase and catch a dream.  She taught me about overcoming excuses (either the ones we place on ourselves, or those we get handed). She always tried to teach me that what other people think doesn't matter, but when someone hurt my feelings, she often cried too.
This is just the tip of the iceberg with my Mom.  I do admire her a lot. Despite most of us not wanting to become our Mother, I hope in a lot of ways I can grow to be more like her.

But this week I found out my time is very limited with Mom.  There's a lot of history to it, but on Monday, Mom was diagnosed with Pulmonary Hypertension.  If you haven't heard of it, you aren't alone; google it and you'll know why most of the family are freaking out.  It's not good- it's terminal and incurable.  Treatments are available, but in many cases only serve to prolong the inevitable and make the patient comfortable. They rate it in stages, 1, 2, 3, and 4 much like cancer and other terminal illnesses.  Based on her symptoms, Mom is most likely stage 3.    AND she most likely has PRIMARY Pulmonary Hypertension, of which the cause is unknown. Only 2 in a million patients are diagnosed with this annually.

My Mom is 54.  Statistically, she may not be here for her 59th birthday. She may not be here to see her grandkids grow up.  She may not ever see my baby brother get married.  She may not be around if he ever has kids.

Selfishly, I am screaming internally, "Mom, please don't leave me! It's not time yet! I can't do life without you!" But in a few short years, I may have to do just that.

So, I think a NEW LOVE STORY starts for us now.  I have a whole lot of loving to do before she leaves.
I love you, Mom!
-L

1 comment:

  1. What a beautiful tribute to her. Your family will be in my prayers.

    ReplyDelete