31 Days: Crazy Day 2

Like I said, October is going to be a crazy month.

A few weeks ago, I decided to take over the Tuesday morning women's small group Bible Study at church.
It was selfish really.
The group meant a lot to me and I felt I needed it for accountability for my quiet times and true bible study.  I needed those discussions and those friendships.  I needed that structure of meeting with these ladies every Tuesday morning.

I had absolutely NO intention of leading the group.
I was just glad to be a participant.

But after a long summer hiatus, our fearless leader {and my friend} decided she had too much on her plate - I can certainly identify- and she needed to step back from the small group.

She let us all know weeks ago so that we had the opportunity to "re-group."

I kept hoping someone else would volunteer to lead the group.

I even had someone else in mind! Isn't that crazy? I had already mentally volunteered someone else - not myself.

But I heard crickets.

And like I always do during an uncomfortable silence, I started talking.
I opened my mouth and let the "what if?" roll out.

I asked my friend what she thought.
Then I asked the group.

Then I thought, I would do the simplest thing possible and find a video series that would require very little from me other than showing up and perhaps some minor tech skills.

But then something happened.
Something unexpected happened.

I decided if I was going to do this, I.WAS.GOING.TO.DO.THIS!

So I went shopping.
I starting shopping online for a study.

It's like looking for a special occasion dress when you aren't sure how fancy the event is.

I had no idea what I was shopping for.
I thought  hoped that I would just know it when I saw it.

So I shopped.

And shopped.

And shopped.

Then I made a list.

Then I asked for second opinions.

Are you tired and frustrated yet?

So was I.

Finally I just went to the Lifeway store and found the ONLY study from my original list of 5.  And that was it.

I was committed.

So here I am.
Not sure where "here" is actually, but we had our first meeting two days ago.

I didn't have a heart attack.
I actually think it went quite well.

I can only credit God with that, because it definitely wasn't me.


And I do believe that if I make through this crazy month with my head still attached, that too will only be credited to Him.